About Me

In the quiet moments at the end of the day, when so much fills your mind and emotions overload your heart, this is the space where I free those thoughts and let them take over These are the thoughts of love and life, joys and frustrations, things I've learned, and my life's failures. In black and white.

Thursday, February 11, 2010

Dearest k

Dearest k,

Hi there!  How are you?  It seems like it's been forever since I saw you last.  It was real hard to get on the plane knowing that you were right there and I was leaving you.  It feels like it has been more than a week.

The week with the **** seemed to last forever.  It wasn't bad though, I loved it.  It's just that every day seemed so long because we were up at 5:45 every morning, and working until 10:30.  Did you ever see that commercial on tv that said that the military does more before 9am than most people do all day?  Well it's true.  It was fun though.  There are a great bunch of people in my unit.  We're all really close now after the last week.  We went through hell together and now we're best friends.  I've tried to call you a couple of times now but haven't been able to get a hold of you.  I miss you and I really want to talk to you.

Hi.  It's now Tuesday and the weekend was really hectic.  Events were scheduled all day long.  People are constantly coming up to me and introducing themselves.  Real friendly.  I've met so many people the last four or five days, I can't even begin to remember who they all are.  I really think I'm going to like it here.  It's a fun place to be.  I wish you could see it, the place is absolutely beautiful, kinda like you.  I have to go right now, I've got another session in 45 minutes and I still have to eat lunch.  I'll write more later.  I love you.

Hi! How are you?  I'm really sorry it's taking me so long to write this letter.  I bet you think I've forgotten you, don't you.  Well, I haven't.  I just haven't had very many opportunities to sit down and write to you.  You wouldn't believe how much reading I've done in the last week.  It seems every **** has a textbook the size of War and Peace.  How are things going for you?  How are things going at my home?  My parents really took a shine to you.  By the way, they are totally rooting for you.  They are constantly telling me what a nice girl you are and how I should be sure and treat you right. Not like I wasn't going to anyway. They like you or they wouldn't have invited you over for dinner and they certainly wouldn't have given you an open ended invite to come over whenever you'd like.  You will have to do that you know.  Keep them close to me that way, okay?

You asked about the weather a couple of times.  On the way to the airport I told you that it was probably dry and hot like a desert, but I was wrong.  It is hot here, there's no two ways about that.  But it is certainly not dry.  It's only rained twice since I've been here, but the humidity is so high here it feels like it's raining all the time.  You know how after it rains on a really hot day, the water will kinda steam off the hot pavement?  It does that here every morning.  You know how when you take a can of soda that's cold outside water forms on the can?  When you do that here, the water forms so fast and in such large amounts, there is a steady drop.  The humidity here is unbelievable.  I've been working out in it every day.  I'm probably getting close to being in the best shape of my life.  I run, cycle or swim every day.  Plus I walk everywhere I go.

It always kinda cracks me up when you ask about the beast.  I don't know why, but it always does.    Nevertheless, I never had an interest in her at all, so don't you worry.  By the way, you are, by your own admission, a cheap date, but not in quite the same way.  I can take you out 12 times for 84cents.  I'll let you figure that one out, but I have a feeling sparks are going to fly about this next time I see you, possibly blue ones.

The first time I saw you up close and in person was at the corner where we used to say our goodbyes.  I was walking from the west to the east and you were going from east to south. You turned left in front of me and we almost bumped into each other.  I had seen your picture before, and remembered you and your name.  I don't remember who you were with that first time or what you were wearing, but I remember it was you.

I'm sorry this is so chopping and taking so long to write but I've got to dash again.  I love you! I really do!

You wouldn't believe how many meetings I have gone to this week.  I've only spent one evening at home since last Thursday and it's tonight, Tuesday.  I tried to call but you weren't home.  I would really like to talk to you some time soon.  We could set up a time for you to call.  By the way, my number is ****.
I do think about you a lot.  You probably have your doubts at this point and I understand that.  I've been listening to the tape of our song a lot.  There are so many memories tied up in that song.  Too many.  Sometimes I get a little misty when I listen to it.  I have your picture on my desk right next to my bed.  I can't stop looking at it.  Z*** took one look at you and said, "wow, she's beautiful!"  I  tried to tell you so many times but you never believed me.  You are you know. I keep expecting you to be down in the hall or somewhere and I'll whip around thinking it was your voice, but it's never you of course.  I just wish it was.  I find myself thinking of you all the time.  I keep wondering what you would think if you saw me marching around in my uniform.  I've got to get someone to take a picture of me so you can see me.  I hear that women go nuts over men in uniforms.  I wonder if you do.  Do you?  We'll just have to find out someday.  I wish it was now.  We could go down to the Gardens and walk by the pond, with the wind blowing through your hair and the sun shining in your eyes.  Just like the old days when we used to go play in the woods.  I love you and miss you so much.

I wish you could know how much I love you, and how much I miss you. I used to think that every move would be as easy as the last, where you could accept the new and file away the past.  This time I just can't do that.  I need you now more than ever, and can't stand being apart from you.  Just remember that no matter how far apart we are, or how long we stay that way, a part of me will always be with you.  I love you.

love
J

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